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Jokes for You from ChooseIndia

"Dear, asked the husband, what exactly is hypnotism?
Hypnotism, replied the wife, is getting a man into your power and then making him do whatever you want him to do.
Snorted the husband, That's not hypnotism - that's marriage.
   
I've got bad new for you. Your wife ran away with your neigh-bour.
Tell me the bad news first.
   
Displayed on a signpost: In dust real development of India - in place of Industrial Development of India.
   
Q: Why are doctors and lawyers never perfect?
A: Because they are always practising.
   
Q: On which way, no one can walk?
A: Norway.
Q: Which is biggest pan of the world?
A: Japan.
Q: Which is the biggest rope in the World?
A: Europe
Q: Which cow doesn't give milk?
A: Moscow
Q: Which cat is not a cat
A: Muscat
   
Q: Which sport is used for carrying people and goods from one place to another?
A: Tran-sport.
   
A man went into a shoe repair shop and told the new assis-tant that he wanted his old shoes soled by the afternoon. When he returned to pick up the shoes, the assistant gave him Rs.20 and said, I sold them almost as soon as you left.
   
Policeman: Did you know that your wife fell out of the car a mile back?
Man: What a relief! I thought I had gone deaf.
   
Q: Where do bees go for a ride?
A: To the buzz-stop.
Q: What travels around the world yet stays in one corner?
A: A postage-stamp
Q: What is full of holes but can hold water?
A: A sponge.
Q: How do you get rid of varnish?
A: Take away the letter "r"
   

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