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Jokes for You from ChooseIndia

The movies they see:
Managers:
Yes Boss
NRIs: Pardes
Gardeners: Kagaz Ke Phool
Astrologers: Ram Jaane
Time Keepers: Lamhe
Tourists: Guide
   
A small town is where you plug in your hair dryer and the streetlights dim. And where the all-night cafes close by 8 p.m.
   
She wanted to see the world - so he gave her a world map!
   
A sign board: If you have nothing to do, please do not do it here.
   
A barber was asked to join his friends sixth wife's funer-al. "We can't go again," said the barber.
"But why not?" asked his wife.
"Well, don't you think its bad that we keep going to funer-als without having called him even once for a similar occa-sion at our house?"
   
What is the opposite of meteorite: meteor-left
What is a foreign ant: Import-ant
What happened twice in America and Asia: The letter "A"
What does a teacher get if she puts all her students under the microscope: A magnifying class.
   
Chemistry Teacher: Jones, what does HN03 signify?
Jones: An, err, I have it right on the tip of my tongue, sir.
Teacher: Well, you better spit it out. It's nitric acid.
   

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