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Jokes for You from ChooseIndia

Man to Wife: Do you know, dear, that the biggest idiot always marries the prettiest woman.
Wife: Itís been a long time since you gave me a compliment but I must say that you did it very nicely.
   
Outside an English coaching centre: Weak in English? We shall improve your weakness.
   
Customer: I would like to try on that dress in the window.
Salesperson: Sorry, madam, but you will have to use the dressing room.
   
Father: Did you children help your mother today?
First Child: Yes daddy. I washed the dishes.
Second Child: I dried them.
Third Child: I picked the pieces.
   
Why did the moron throw the butter out of the window?
He wanted to see the butter-fly.
   
A little boy on coming back from school to his mother: Oh! I had a tough day at office.
Mom: Office?
Boy: Yes. The Principalís office.
   
Girl: Will you do anything for me?
Boy: Yes, anything.
Girl: Then jump from the terrace.
Boy: Ladies first, please.
   
Resolution 1:
1994: I will try to be a better husband to Maggie.
1995: I will not leave Maggie.
1996: I will try for reconciliation with Maggie.
1997: I will try to be a better husband to Wanda.
   
Resolution 2:
1994: I will stop looking at other women.
1995: I will not get involved with Wanda.
1996: I will not let Wanda pressure me into another marriage.
1997: I will stop looking at other women.
   

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