Justice is Truely Blind. After a recent transfer to the
criminal court, Judge Robert Hutson of the Orange County Superior Court
was invited to watch presiding Judge David Carter blaze through some 100
felony cases a day in order to get the feel of the criminal court's calendar
and events. One day, after Judge Carter was called away from the bench,
Judge Hutson stepped in to call the days' criminal calendar. Asked how
his first solo day of criminal law went, Judge Hutson is recalled having
only one complaint. He had trouble reading Judge Carter's large wall calendar,
which hangs some 15 feet away from the bench. Judge Hutson was quoted as
By JUDGE HUTSON: "The court will instruct the court's
staff to make those numbers larger and write clearer. They're fuzzy!"
An attorney was defending a case on behalf of a modular
home vendor. The Plaintiff, a purchaser of a modular home, sold and set
up by the vendor, had sued when his home developed substantial cracks in
its ceilings and walls. The Plaintiff was on the stand and had just testified
about the cracks his home had experienced, when the following occured:
Plaintiff's Counsel: "Tell me sir, why do you think your
home developed cracks in the ceilings and walls?"
Defense Counsel: "Objection your Honor, this witness
has no expertise in this area, there is an obvious Lack of Foundation --"
Plaintiff: "-- that's exactly the problem, your client
tried to put this home on cinder block, which is a lack of foundation!!"
I want my MTV. After telephoning a local "Circuit City"
electronics store in search of a new television set, Mr. Hlywa was told
he would receive a telephone call back regarding the availablity of the
make and model of television he was interested in purchasing. After just
a few minutes the office receptionist informed him that "Circuit" was on
the line. The following conversation transpired:
"Wow! That was fast, what did you find out regarding the
"Excuse me?" the female voice replied.
"The T.V., what did you find out?" Mr. Hlywa again queried.
"I'm sorry sir?"
"Darn! O.K. then what about that larger T.V. being advertised?
Do you have that one?" "We don't have T.V.'s here sir," the female voice
"What do you mean? Sure you do, I've seen them there," Mr.
"Sir, I'm telling you --" the female voice muttered, cut
off in mid-sentance.
"-- Look! Do you have the T.V. or not?" a now puzzled Mr.
"SIR! This is the 9th 'Circuit' Court of Appeals calling
to inform you that oral arguments will not be required in the matter before