What does DIANA stand for?
Died In A Nasty Accident!
What does DODI stand for?
Died Opposite DI.
Or...
... Died Of Driver Intoxication
... Died On Dashboard Impact
Did you know that Princess Diana had AIDS?
Automobile Impacted Diana Spencer
Or...
... Another Idiot Driver Smashed
Do you hear about the new business association between Nike and Mercedes?
The slogan will be: "Just Di it".
What's the difference between a Mercedes and a Porsche?
Diana wouldn't be seen dead in a Porsche!
Or...
... a BMW
... a Lada
... etc.
What did St Peter say to Di at the Pearly Gates?
Wipe that greasy "merc" off your face.
What did Di wear for her funeral?
A dark blue bonnet.
What did Prince Charles say when he heard about the automobile accident?
Well, that's the way the Mercedes BENZ.
What does a bee have in common with a Mercedes?
They both make Royal Jelly.
What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?
A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
Did you hear that Princess Diana was suffering from PMS?
Pulverised Mercedes Syndrome.
Why didnt the airbag on the Merc function properly?
It was strapped into a safety belt in the back seat.
You've read Fergie's books about "Budgie the Helicopter"?
Now read Diana's book, "Scrunchie the dark blue Mercedes"
Hear about the new Mercedes?
It comes with two airbags and three bodybags.
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