Candle in the wind (take two)
"Goodbye Diana-queen, though I never new you at all,
I fantasized about you, while in the shower stall..." "Even
when you died, the paparazzi photographed you, while at the same time,
took your pulse to make sure you wouldn't come alive...." "And
it seems to me, you lived your life, like an adultress in the castle, never
knowing, who you slept with, so the prince would give you hassle."
"I would have liked to love you, but I was just a queer,
I slept with Charles long before, your highness ever did..." Sydney
Morning Herald's Stay in Touch column has been running a competition for
reworked lyrics to Candle in the Wind. This one is funny:
What did the paparazzi do with the little bits of Di's
body before the pigs arrived?
Made a pizza and took pictures of it!
I heard Di gave the paparrazzi the finger and also some
of her toes as well!
Where were Dodi and Di going when they were being chased
by the Papparazzi?
To meet a Pole
Why do the Papparazi go around sticking cameras in peoples
faces and taking photos?
Because their dicks don't work
Did you hear that three paparazzi died in a tunnel the
They were being chased by Danii Minogue.
Jerry Adams has denied that the IRA has asked the paparazzi
for photos of the royal family and members of the British parliament.
When I saw the headline "Paparazzi hunts Di to death",
my immediate reaction was: "I'll never buy another of his records!"
Why did God invent the cockroach?
So the paparazzi could have someone to look down to.
Did you hear what Di said when the French photographers
asked if they could take her picture in the car wreck?
"Over my dead Dodi."
What was Diana's last word?
What was the last thing Di said to Dodi?
'These paparazzi are driving me up the wall'
What did Paparazzi say before chasing Princess Di on
I'd kill for a picture, and he did.
And after the crash: Hey! This is better than the OJ
case. Could you bleed a little more? I need more colour.